Last week was a busy week. Well, not I but perhaps almost everyone in the region was. There was news of people evacuating, going to safer places for the fear of landslides, floods, lahar and mudflow, all because of a tropical storm which hasn’t leave the Philippine area of responsibility as of yet. For 2 weeks of rain and gloomy weather and dangers of storm in our minds, today’s weather is fine. Even though today is sunny with scattered clouds in the sky, some areas in the northern part of Luzon (I am located south of Luzon, where the typhoon was originally reported to land and may had created destruction) is still under the tropical storm scare. On the news, those areas are flooded, no electricity and suffered quite terribly. Luckily, from where I am, there was no flood, massive destruction, or landslides which are originally premeditated and reported to possibly happen. The town was actually ready for the flood and most especially the typhoon. It was reported that it may become a super typhoon because of its slow motion and strong gustiness, but actually, there was only a cold gust of wind, gloom and light rain. Though, we were in tropical storm signal no.3, it felt like it was just winter (without snow that is). So even if it landed in the area, there was a probability of zero casualties because everyone was prepared. Thanks to the news (no pun intended for it was really originally to land our region)! It was however a good thing that tropical storm Mina didn’t land in most areas in the region...Sadly though to the northerners. But I am pretty sure they have prepared and casualties are low (on second thought, the news says there are casualties).

As I write this, the typhoon Mina is still in the northern part of Luzon, destructing livelihoods of my fellow Filipinos. On the western part, the typhoon Lando which was prior to Mina, came back after he created chaos in Vietnam. So right now there are two typhoons in the Philippine area. Not only that, down south a low pressure is sighted that can possibly become another typhoon which will be called Nonoy. How unfortunately Philippines can be in seasons like this. There was even a text message that circulated which says that Lando ran away from Mina because Lando doesn’t like Mina. Lando came back because Nonoy is about to come, who he truly likes. Simply put, Lando is gay.

I actually do not have anything to say or have anything to release from my system. Blogging or getting my thoughts in to words somehow becomes a stress buster for me. Since my last post, everything seems ok. Seems, because I feel totally fine since then. I have no queries about life, nor have any distressing moments. Well, except for one thing. I might not be celebrating Christmas with my family for the first time. I casually mentioned in my previous post that I will be leaving the country soon. I wanted to leave after Christmas so I could spend it with my family and friends here but my sister wants me to go to her as soon as possible.

And it is not just for her to have someone close to her to be just at reach when the need for something arises. After all, she’s married now and she has few of her friends there as well. This journey is for me, a journey to get on track with my life again. After two years of being plain and worthless, I have to get on and, finally, live the real life again. The real life in the real world where there are deadlines, 9 hours of labor, getting paid, rush hours, lack of sleep and, well, spending a well deserve break from what we call work.

For two years, I have done nothing. I have not established anything for myself. And it’s time to make sacrifices for a better me, and a better future.

Also, for two years, I nonchalantly hoped for a love affair. But I guess I am never lucky in love.

Also, for two years, I have realized, I only have a few friends. Most of them who I thought were friends are just mere acquaintances.

Also, for two years, nothing has change. All the things I dream of when I was a few years younger have not happened. There were a few desires and fancies that happened but they never were permanent.

So after two years of just living a plain, boring, waiting for something to happen like love, for instance, I have to sacrifice and get into my system that sometimes to reach for a dream we have to leave the past behind.

To reach for a dream we have to establish a will driven self even if breaking away from the things we got used to seem agonizing.

It is true, nothing in this world is permanent but change. Attachments, dependence are disturbance in making a beautiful life of our own. After all, everything changes and everything will never be the same again.

A week ago, I received a message [from the unrequited love of my life] it says that “it’s childish to think that if you simply allow the world to spin around you and let things happen everything will be ok. Life is not an existence, it’s an experience. I say, grow up, make mistakes, take risks, maybe even fall in love, take part, have faith. Life is too short to be wasted on “maybes” and “if onlys”…. At the end of the day, when all is said and done, its still you who decides.”

It struck me that indeed I just allowed the world to spin around me. I cannot believe that five years of learning what we call psychology and took lessons on what we call philosophy, I just simply let everything happen by itself. Have I forgotten or I just did not learn anything because I am stubborn? Or maybe I was too secured that everything will be just fine? Well, today, it occurred to me, everything will not be “just fine” if I stay in this lifestyle of just letting the world to spin on me.

I have to learn that sacrifice is not a tragedy at all but instead, in my heart I know, sacrifice is the source of pleasure and joy.

Well, after all the free flow of thoughts from my head through my fingers, I actually do have something to say or have something to release from my system. As it always been, blogging or getting my thoughts in to words became a stress buster for me. Since my last post, I thought everything was ok. So I seemed, because I feel totally fine since then. But deep within, I have ignored that I do have queries about life, and did have a distressing moment.

So my word from today up to the coming year is sacrifice. I will grow up, make mistakes, take risks, take part, and have faith. In a couple of weeks or so, I momentarily will leave the people I love and the few I have established friendship with. In a couple of weeks or so, I have to leave all these things that I got used to. I know this time, if I spin the world myself, everything will be just fine. I am hoping it will be.

Last Tuesday...

What a beautiful morning!!! I woke up pretty early today. At 6:30AM it seems as if I am fully charged of energy even if I slept past midnight. Unlike most days, less than 8 hours of sleep would usually ruin the rest of my day with laziness coupled with bodily malaise. But today, I am full energy! Full of good thoughts!

It’s a beautiful day. Cloudy and gloomy, cool gust of wind as if it’s going to rain any moment. Days like this I imagine of Europe. I was told London usually has a gloomy weather. I see it in movies. Days like this I dream of going to work fully clothed in black suit and topped with a coat walking the streets and trot like a model. Brushing shoulders with people in the streets and flashing a contagious smile to people I come across with seems a delightful idea especially when you receive a smile back from their faces.

But that is just a dream. I don’t even have a job, much less, I don’t know if I’ll ever se foot in Europe.

I can still flash a smile to people though but not the kind of beautiful friendly people I have pictured in my head. Its either people will wonder if I am demented or just someone desperately ugly flirting so early in the day to get hooked up later in the night!

What a beautiful day it is, really. My cousin felt it, too. She said she feels the Christmas breeze coming. I can smell the earth, although it still smell a little of the mud from last Sunday’s flood, it still smells fresh. I can hear birds chirping, a sound I have ignored for quite sometime already. All these are so soothing.

I can’t help but stare. I am having a moment. I’ll savor the beautiful day, with a Marlboro and black coffee, come…join me.

A less than the ordinary citizen wonders…

Christmas is indeed on its way, again. Since oh5 I feel as if I’m deteriorating as days go by. Perhaps that’s what happens when one has nothing to do, have a rather stressful environment, no love life, disturbing media, not to mention the worsening government I see and hear on TV everyday!

Every citizen wants what is best for the country, who doesn’t? But with all these opinions every one has on how to have a better country and government, is clashing on its own. Every one thinks their ideas are better than most others. They all have the conviction that what they think is right, hence, the conflict. So it’s never ending. They can debate and even have senate hearings all they want but they’ll never come to an agreement if they will never learn that to give way is sometimes ok. You can also add the never ending protesters who I don’t really understand where they are coming from. They have opinions themselves and disagree in almost everything the government has to offer. I have my opinions as well but it is never to agree nor disagree in a snap. Thinking must be thorough if it involves larger things. I don’t bother go to the streets and march it with placards that states, “impeach GMA”or what have yous. I could, given the chance, but I don’t. There are more reasonable ways aside from bringing it to the streets. [What I don’t like about STREET PROTESTS is that] (It) attracts a lot of people. The more people they gather, the more powerful and stronger they think they become. But the people they gather, do they understand what they are fighting for? Have the overall knowledge as to why they are marching and protesting?

If we are going to disagree on everything the president does, or what else’s, well, for sure, nothing good is going to happen. What happens in the senate, even if I don’t have full understanding of what they are wasting money and time on, is rather a lampoon to my eyes, as well as street protests. Eventhough they’re not funny at all, they are irritating! Of course each one of them want what’s best [for the country and its people], with their own personal motives whatever they maybe. These personal motives make it even more irritating.

But I don’t stretch. It’ll just make me one of them. I am but a less than the ordinary citizen. I mean I am no good in politics but where are the morals? What happened to what we have learned in years in catechism or religion classes all these years? All religion has taught the basics.

This Christmas, for once, I wish no one will talk bad against each other. Support what the president thinks is better, she is ruling. Instead of disagreeing to her every decision, they must think of each essential detail as to why she makes a certain decision. And if it isn’t good and will further lead to chaos, then discuss the pros and cons, the why’s and tell the people about it and come up with a better solution. Its actually simple when you think of it. I know that is what they do but the ulterior motive is what breaks the good in their decision.

What I learned in senior year catechism back in highschool, each decision must always fall in the morals to which must consider three things at first: will it harm the people around you, will it harm you and most of all will it harm the morals set by God. In the process of elimination, if any, the least affected can be considered. However, sometimes in decision making what the majority thinks is what everyone will get. And the majority I am sure wants what is best for the people, the individual, and God. You know what I think is best, the same thing. Whatever is good for everyone must be the ultimate decision they should agree on. Not what will be good for them alone.


This Christmas, I will light a candle for everyone ruling the country. Whatever their ulterior motives are should not be on their top lists, {or} should not be in any given set of circumstance. They must hear the cries of who put them in their positions. For GMA, I certainly do hope what her detractors accuse her of are just products of their rather wild imaginations. And for the Filipino people, be responsible citizens. Don’t just believe what you see and hear from the seemingly conspiracy theories we hear and see in media. Since what we have in the government is a dirty and dangerous game, let us THINK! And act upon ourselves. Afterall, to see good change, we must act upon ourselves first, rather than put the blame on who ever. If fighting for the country is your game, no question on that, however, fight for what is RIGHT, not ON WHAT YOU ALONE, think is right (since we are talking millions of people, ten, 20, 30…100 isn’t a majority.).

Or, it is simply just basic: do not do unto others what you do not want what others do unto you and Good change starts from within. We all should reform.

I am not sure if I should be glad I am leaving the country soon. This is my home and I definitely love it here, this is where my family, friends and my heart belong. But I am not getting any younger or richer and like I said, I think I am deteriorating as days go by. I needed to support myself and sustain a good healthy life and live it wonderfully because life is so short. I just hope when I come back, everything is in its place the way it must and should be.

A Survey Meme from Friendster…about our highSchool

Copied from Fraulein Olaso, one of my Friends in friendster and a school/classmate in highschool, nevertheless, a friend. if you understand the language and our dialect, you may find this funny...Read on!

1. Bakit ka nahuhuli sa pila bago mag-flag ceremony?
its either, maulan o kaya ang tagal ng sasakyan

2 . Anong fave mong bilhin sa canteen?

- mountain dew, chocolate cringles, egg pie and nachoos, tsaka chippy palan, su pula

3.Na-guidance/principal's office ka na ba?

-superb! a couple of times

4. Sinong fave teacher mo doon?

she's still my favorite until now. but she passed away when we were in 4th year, sadly. She's the best!! Ma'am Oraa. History teacher

5.Sinong HATEST teacher mo naman?

heehehehe.she caught me with my kodigo.hahahah it was ok sana, my bad. but she embarassed me not because i cheated but because i am gay! darn it!

6. San ka usually tumatambay? Why?

corridors. wala lang, just watch the people in school and su crush ko sa patio, sadto bakalan sa palamig na buko ag su chicaron kropek ni manay na sobrang aliiii ku sawsawan, which i totally like!

7. What's your most unforgettable experience?

this is rather sad. because of my pride, i lost a good frienly relationship with Kristine Imperial. i still regret that day in 2nd year. if there ever is a chance to change one day in highschool, that would be that day.

8 . Most unforgettable any thing in HS?

1st year and 3rd year, whenever my class and the class beside ours would sing Happy bithday songs to EVa and/or Luke, one after the other, even if its not their birthdays! OHHHH how i miss that days

and the prom! remember guys, we threw the icings and made the 4th floor a mess after the party! when school resume that monday, i am one of the suspects who started it. But i am damn innocent, i was not. naki join lang. Fun eh!

10. Sinong una mong nakilala sa highschool mo?

-i know most of them already since its just a step from elementary. among the newcomers, Jelicoe made the biggest buzz in highschool,i only knew him by face and name then, because Janessa likes her! hahaha

11 . Sino-sino mga kabarkada mo nung HS?

i had separate clicks. the ones i still keep up to this days are Janis, Kristine, Jhobeth who became closer to me. in HS, i have plenty of friends. there's Milay, Gagal, Hazel F, Angelica M, Lolita, Fatima, Kyla, Eva...uhmmmmm...they are so many!

12 . Nami-miss mo na ba yung uniform mo?

belive it or not, I once did! i fitted my old uniform before the recent strong typhoon destroyed it! i forgot to take a photo of myself. Ithat just gave me an idea. I'll wear that darn uniform once again and profile it. LOL

14. Favorite teacher's quotable quote?

there were many, but the funniest was "during that time" by the controversial Ms Ribaya!

and i recall, during breaks and when josephine bernaldez would stand infront of the class and write who the noisy pupils were on the board, as if we will care even if a point corresponds to a piso payment, the class will play sharades and reenact a teacher's mannerism! who top the imitated teacher? who else but Mr Monte's dance routine where he has to bend over and strot like a duck backwards!! hahahaha. Erickson Orbon imitates it best!

15 . Most unforgettable person/ persons? Why?

aside from friends: Gagal and Paul John. i have a secret crush on them!! hala!!! aminan na!! ahooo ahooo!!

16. Kelan sa tingin mo dadating ang yearbook?

as if there will ever be in our batch! ginugurang na basang kita people! migraan na ngani gayud ako!

17. I-describe ang mukha mo sa grad pic...

fuck! forget it! watta smug! i was very thin and full of that nasty tigidig all over my damn face!

18. Anong binibili mo sa labas tuwing uwian ?

buko palamig ni manay, kropek with matching sawsawan sa secret sawsawan recipe ni manay. and the bebe.

19. Nakakita ka na ba ng multo sa school?

there was a scare in the prayer room back then, in the old building but i never saw one.

20. Nangarag ka ba sa updating/pag hahabol sa projects?

Super! I love cramming. my powers come out when i'm in a rush.

21 . Anong unang-una mong ginawa right after graduation?

graduation party sa parkview..

22 . Ano naman ang papel mo sa Intrams?

choral recitation and sometimes kacheapan na mga monologues. ewwww... kasusupog as i think of it

23. Favorite Janitor/Janitress?

i never knew them by their names...faces amo. so i cant pin point who is who. or shall i say, uda man akp favorite kanda. we never got the chance to get close. :-)

24. Kung papalitan ang color ng uniform ano?

i like it just the way it is...

25 . Nasa Friendster mo ba yung crushmo sa HS mo?

su usad, si gagal. the other one, man, i've searched the internet but to my dismay! if i only have a credit card I have had paid backround check finder a long time ago...talk about desperation, my god!

26. Did you ever regret going to your HS?

Hell No!!! im proud of LACO... and I love LACO. The best memories of my life happened in that school. Sayang, uda, teenage sexual encounters on my part. waaaahhhh Ahoo Ahoo!! hahaha

27. Kilala mo ba kung sino ang nag-post nito?

Oh yah! Fraulein Olaso. Full of humor that girl is! Bing Loyzaga look alike, except for the height maybe. hehehhe Peace Frau!

28. Sino sa mga ka-batch natin ang dapat isali sa STARSTRUCK?

Isnt it obvious? AKOOOOOO!! MEEEE, mare! do you have to ask pa? hehehe!

29. San ka na nag-aral ng H/S?

ah ah. i thought this survey is made for graduates of-LA CONSOLACION
COLLEGE..the best! So there, Proud to be a producrt of LCC!!

30. Sino ang favorite love team sa batch mo?

Eva Cepe and Luke Margallo!!!!!!! WQooooHoooo!!! hahahaha

31. Anu ang best section mo?

1st year Loyalty and 3rd year perseverance!!! we ROCK!

and lastly, photos I wanna Share from the week that was…

Neice Georj woke me up one day, we ended up playing with the camera...






...and with his Dad, my brother, who is about to leave for Cebu to go back to Camp

These photos are taken on the night of November 1st at the cemetary. Together with my cousin Apple's, who is in Italy, son.


he's probably wondering why my lips look like a chickens arse

I didnt know when was this taken and my sister probably took it. I just found this in my computer in the recent photo uploads.
do we make a great couple? hahaha
...And yesterday, I just wanted to pose with a damn make up on. Enjoy!




I've seen in other blogs that they post what their desktop looks likes. So I am doing the same way. Here's how my Desktop looks like.



My Blog celebrated its Birthday on Nov 2nd. This blog is two years old! For the 5066 visitors who took time to be here, from then and today... THANK YOU!!! and double THANK YOU's to those who had the time to comment. Please keep 'em comin'!